Understanding Postpartum Depression Symptoms: What’s Normal, What’s Not, and When to Get Help
By Danielle Smith, LCSW, PMH-C
“Why doesn’t this feel the way I thought it would?”
You give birth and expect the movie version of postpartum: joyful tears, a deep bond with baby, and a smooth transition into motherhood. But instead, you feel overwhelmed, exhausted, or disconnected - and wonder what’s wrong with you.
Let’s start with this: nothing is wrong with you.
The postpartum period brings a tidal wave of emotional, physical, and hormonal changes. For many new moms, those changes can lead to baby blues - or something deeper, like postpartum depression (PPD).
Baby Blues vs. Postpartum Depression: Know the Difference
Baby Blues
Affects 60–80% of new moms
Triggered by hormonal shifts and sleep deprivation
Begins 2–3 days postpartum, peaks around day 5
Lasts up to 2 weeks
Symptoms: mood swings, tearfulness, irritability, exhaustion, reactivity
You still feel mostly like yourself underneath it all
Postpartum Depression (PPD)
Lasts longer than 2 weeks
Symptoms are more intense and persistent
May include:
Frequent crying or emotional numbness
Difficulty bonding with your baby
Sleep/appetite disturbances
Feelings of hopelessness, shame, or guilt
Intrusive thoughts, panic, or rage
Thoughts of harming yourself or your baby
If your symptoms feel heavy, ongoing, or interfere with daily functioning, you may be experiencing more than the baby blues.
Important: Partners can experience postpartum depression too.
What PPD Might Sound Like
Often, PPD doesn’t sound like “I think I’m depressed.” It might sound like:
“I don’t feel like myself.”
“I haven’t showered in days.”
“I feel so disconnected from the baby.”
“I can’t sleep even when the baby sleeps.”
“This is all too much.”
If this sounds like you or someone you love, know this: you are not alone—and there is help.
“Motherhood Isn’t What I Thought It Would Be…”
That’s one of the most common phrases I hear from new moms in therapy. During pregnancy, we form ideas of what life with a baby will look like. But often, reality feels very different:
Breastfeeding isn’t intuitive or easy
Sleep is elusive
Relationships feel strained
You feel like a stranger to yourself
These unmet expectations can lead to grief, guilt, and emotional distress.
But this is not your fault. You weren’t fully prepared—because most people don’t talk about the hard stuff. That’s where therapy comes in.
Treatment for Postpartum Depression
Postpartum depression is temporary and treatable. With support, you can begin to feel more like yourself again.
Therapy offers a safe, non-judgmental space to:
Talk through what you’re feeling
Process the shift in your identity
Work through relationship tension
Reduce anxiety, perfectionism, and comparison
Grieve what hasn’t gone as expected
Common Goals of Postpartum Therapy:
Coping with the identity shift of becoming a mom
Processing expectations vs. reality
Managing anger, intrusive thoughts, or emotional overload
Strengthening communication with your partner
Addressing grief, loss, or traumatic experiences
You don’t have to keep pushing through and pretending you’re fine. Support is available—and healing is possible.
📞 Click here to schedule a free consultation
📧 danielle@empoweredcounselingnj.com
